Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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