Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize