I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
God, you're like boner-b-gone
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
