never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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