she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
