This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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