walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
