dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
