I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize