he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
