New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
