My friends, they love my intelligence
are you so shy because you have an std?
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.