i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I have so many feelings about this burrito
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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