On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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