i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
