Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Enjoy the penises
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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