me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Randomize
