$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
