what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
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