??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
