I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
