Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (267): Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:( http://tfl.nu/yddk
  Replies (3) Good night (931) Bad night (2665)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (256): She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating. http://tfl.nu/eva0
  Replies (58) Good night (4546) Bad night (2113)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on. http://tfl.nu/zkya
  Replies (13) Good night (3873) Bad night (723)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over? http://tfl.nu/e898
  Replies (11) Good night (3466) Bad night (2414)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom. http://tfl.nu/dmbr
  Replies (16) Good night (2180) Bad night (6725)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights http://tfl.nu/27p8
  Replies (21) Good night (3070) Bad night (2451)
• Favorite

  (646): View more from New York

  Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (646): Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going? http://tfl.nu/kahl
  Replies (12) Good night (2511) Bad night (4442)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (250): dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf http://tfl.nu/yf3n
  Replies (7) Good night (2834) Bad night (1123)
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (607): Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair. http://tfl.nu/k6ce
  Replies (4) Good night (670) Bad night (923)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (520): I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night. http://tfl.nu/u2a7
  Replies (5) Good night (1500) Bad night (778)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking http://tfl.nu/9ua1
  Replies (3) Good night (1122) Bad night (616)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (775): Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program. http://tfl.nu/5e2w
  Replies (1) Good night (626) Bad night (288)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.

  (469): View more from Texas

  I have the flu.

  (214): View more from Texas

  I don't give a shit

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now. (469): I have the flu. (214): I don't give a shit http://tfl.nu/yb1n
  Replies (12) Good night (1236) Bad night (314)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (904): I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night. http://tfl.nu/zawb
  Replies (1) Good night (192) Bad night (442)
• Favorite

  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (902): I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks. http://tfl.nu/hv7j
  Replies (5) Good night (796) Bad night (268)

Randomize