come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
