Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
