why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I want to fling myself into the sun
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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