What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Randomize
