Pants 0. Shit 1.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Randomize