I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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