just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Fuck me I smell like cheese
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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