So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
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