Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
