And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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