Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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