I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
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