Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.

  (1-614): View more from Ohio

  I had better be fucking involved with step four.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez. (1-614): I had better be fucking involved with step four. http://tfl.nu/poz4
  Replies (46) Good night (5294) Bad night (838)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it http://tfl.nu/sa3y
  Replies (52) Good night (1323) Bad night (6152)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum http://tfl.nu/2gzo
  Replies (6) Good night (3860) Bad night (1070)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis. http://tfl.nu/5wmm
  Replies (27) Good night (5648) Bad night (1128)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs (609): hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks http://tfl.nu/8a0z
  Replies (3) Good night (2009) Bad night (532)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (650): Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college http://tfl.nu/e5ta
  Replies (1) Good night (1348) Bad night (593)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary. http://tfl.nu/ntpi
  Replies (4) Good night (1773) Bad night (498)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (804): We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt. http://tfl.nu/2b1c
  Replies (7) Good night (700) Bad night (1842)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame http://tfl.nu/dqi5
  Replies (2) Good night (1674) Bad night (424)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT. http://tfl.nu/j08n
  Replies (4) Good night (1210) Bad night (285)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay http://tfl.nu/bes3
  Replies (5) Good night (685) Bad night (270)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  Sadly, she's the porn star that got away

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (954): Sadly, she's the porn star that got away http://tfl.nu/sl2s
  Replies (3) Good night (290) Bad night (464)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.

  (1+61): View more from

  Dude, you're not even gay.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+61): I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that. (1+61): Dude, you're not even gay. http://tfl.nu/9cst
  Replies (5) Good night (855) Bad night (279)
• Favorite

  (971): View more from Oregon

  I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (971): I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters http://tfl.nu/ncp4
  Replies (1) Good night (620) Bad night (211)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up. http://tfl.nu/p8h2
  Replies (0) Good night (308) Bad night (107)

Randomize