We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
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