i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Randomize
