it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
