Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
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remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
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