she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
