I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Randomize