I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
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