Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Life without a bra equals bliss.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
