THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
