I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
