i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I want her autograph on my taint
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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