Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
He passed out mid-signature
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Watching her eat just hurts me
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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