so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
the night ended with taco bell and tears
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Randomize
