Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.

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(239): View more from Florida

you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys

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(803): View more from South Carolina

you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.

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(516): View more from New York

Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(417): View more from Missouri

I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked

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(718): View more from New York

I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"

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(469): View more from Texas

Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take

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(620): View more from Kansas

We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.

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(763): View more from Minnesota

Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.

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