WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
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